


Miraculous Drabbles

by Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: CROISSANTS ARE LIFE, Competitive, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Crack, Heartrate, Innocent rose, Julerose - Freeform, Lila salt, M/M, Multiple AU, Nathaniel Defence Squad, Rabbit Alix Kubdel | Bunnyx, collage AU, no hate, ships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:35:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28033254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm/pseuds/Speaking_Fluent_Sarcasm
Summary: These are random Miraculous drabbles that pop into my head. I do requests if you comment and I also will do friendship drabbles with no romance. I hope you like this as it is my first delve into fanfic writing. Most of these stories are inspired by my random friends at my school. No hate tho!!Rated teen for swearing and a tiny bit of homophobia.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Croissant(s), Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Alix Kubdel & Nathaniel Kurtzberg, Alix Kubdel/Cake, Alix Kubdel/Lê Chiến Kim, Alya Césaire & Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug, Alya Césaire/Nino Lahiffe, Friendships - Relationship, Ivan Bruel/Mylène Haprèle, Juleka Couffaine/Rose Lavillant, Lila Rossi/karma, Luka Couffaine/Kagami Tsurugi, Marc Anciel/Nathaniel Kurtzberg, Max Kanté/Sabrina Raincomprix
Comments: 12
Kudos: 12





	1. Online cookies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose gets the wrong idea about web cookies and Juleka decides to give her special girl a surprise.

Juleka was waiting for Rose to emerge from her house for school when she found out about Rose's strange idea. She had guessed her girlfriend would be at least five minutes before meeting her, most likely because she was looking for the little Ladybug bag Juleka gave her when they first began dating. After a couple of minutes passed, Juleka leaned back against a low brick wall and began to play Among Us on her phone. 

After a few rounds, including one success as an imposter, Rose came sprinting out, checked the post box, frowned, and then rushed back inside calling: "5 more minutes!!"

When Rose had finally got herself together they set off, the strange behaviour of a few moments ago was - temporarily - forgotten as Juleka chivvied Rose away from a couple of puppies they met on their way. She was worriedly checking her watch when Rose's cold little hand slid into hers. 

" Jules?"  
"Yes Rosie?"  
"Have you ever been posted some cookies?"  
"Ummm... Not that I remember..."  
"Oh, ok then."

After a few moments of silence Juleka asked, "Have you ever had any cookies posted to you?" 

Rose sighed, "No, not yet, and I'm always ordering them too!!"  
"Ah. Well where do you order them from?"

"Lots of places actually!" Rose exclaimed, "Whenever I go on a new site online, it tells me that they use cookies to 'provide you with a great user experience.' They've never actually sent me any yet though. I bet they are just really busy. One day though, they'll see my orders and then I'll have loads of cookies!!"

Juleka smiled, having understood what Rose had been talking about. As they continued walking, an idea formed and she began to smile...

______________________________

A few days later, Rose burst into class, just before the bell, with a huge grin on her face. She slid into her seat and instantly began telling Juleka what had made her so happy.

"They've arrived!!!!" She squealed happily, "They finally sent me my cookies! I have 5 boxes and they are all my favourite types!! Some even have pink icing roses...."

She nattered on through the class about how thrilled she was to have got her biscuits. Juleka smiled to herself. She really did adore her funny, little Rosie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it is so short, it was just a funny little scenario that I thought up. Pls comment and tell me what to improve or if you have any ideas of your own you want me to write about.


	2. Nathaniel Defence Squad: Origins 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are a few OC character I own but they don't really matter. I own nothing else except the plot. I will be doing more on the defence squad!!! Possible Heartrate and Nath and Alix are best friends. No one can change my mind! *Laughs maniacally*

The NDS (Nathaniel defence squad) has been in place for 3 years. Honestly, Nath has never felt safer. Here is how it all began...

___________Founder - Alix Kubdel _____________________________________________

It was a Saturday afternoon and Nathaniel was sitting under a tree sketching the Eiffel Tower. He had always admired the beautiful pattern in the framework. He had nearly reached a stage in his sketch where he would start to add colour when a shadow loomed over him.

"Well, well, well. Look who it is," sneered the shadow, "The sad little loser with no friends."

The boy stepped back and Nathaniel could now recognise him as the school 'bad boy' Raoul Shaw.

"What do you want Shaw?" Nath snapped. A very bad move.

"Me? I don't want anything!" Raoul exclaimed in mock outrage, " Me and my buddies just wanted to see your drawing!!"

Two hulking figures stepped up behind him. Joshua and Alfie were twins, both bigger and more muscular than Ivan (basically they were clichéd goons), and they practically worshipped Raoul.

Smirking, Raoul stepped forward and snatched his sketchbook. He screwed up his face and studied the drawing in disgust for a few moments. Then, he tore it out of the booklet and tossed it to the side where Alfie trod it into the ground.

"Oh dear! Your work seems to be a little muddy," Raoul smirked, "Maybe we should look at some other pic-"

"HEY!! Leave him alone!!" A familiar voice yelled.

Raoul and his goons turned in unison toward the noise. Alix Kubdel was standing by the road glaring daggers at Raoul.

"How sweet," Raoul sneered after he had regained his composure, "The munchkin is defending the loser."

Nath winced. He almost felt sorry for Raoul now. Almost.

"What. The. HELL. Did you just call me Raoul?" Alix growled, visibly trying to contain her anger.

"Munch. Kin." Raoul sneered, "On account of you not growing since your 5th birthday, Honey."

Nath almost groaned. Raoul was dead meat, no one gets away with insulting Alix Kubdel without a broken nose. And thencalling her honey, he may as well just jump off the Eiffel Tower.

Alix's face slowly turned a bright red red that rivalled Nath's untidy mop of hair.

"Back away from Nath. Now." Alix spat, "Or do you want me to come over there and break something?"

"Come on then Munchkin, try it!" Raoul laughed.

Joshua and Alfie both began strolling down the path towards Alix, very obviously blocking her way. She smiled. Then, in a blur of pink and black she sped down the path toward the duo. You honestly had to feel sorry for them. They had no chance. Both of them flew back as she barrelled into them and streaked toward Raoul. She flashed past Nath, her fist already swinging towards Raoul's face. With a sickening crunch, Alix broke the bully's nose and snatched back Nathaniel's sketch book.

The bullies ran for their fucking lives.

Alix skated back over to Nathaniel and bowed deeply, offering his sketchbook.

"Your book, my liege," she mocked.

"My knight in scruffy skates," he teased.

"I'm offended!! These are brand new!!!" Alix exclaimed in mock horror.

"Shut up you tiny little weirdo."

"What? No 'Thanks for saving me Alix' or 'How amazing! You're my hero'?"

Rolling his eyes, Nathaniel got up from under the tree and picked up his ruined picture. Alix rolled up behind him and plucked it out of his hands.

"I'm gonna keep this," she announced, "To remind me of the day I saved your ass!"

"If you shut up I'll buy you cake."

She considered carefully, "Fine, for today."

Laughing, the two friends made their way to the Dupain-Cheng bakery. Cake is the best kind of therapy. (I should know :P)

___________Members - Juleka & Rose _____________________________________________

A week after the 'Raoul Incident' as Alix called it, Miss Bustier's entire class were heading to the Dupain-Cheng Bakery for some free cake (Croissants for Adrien of course).

"Hey Tinkerbell!!" Kim taunted his tiny friend, " Bet I can beat you to the bakery!!"

Alix smirked, "Loser buys the winner a cake of their choice."

"Deal. Three...two....one....GO!!!"

The duo sped off, leaving a trail of dust behind them.

"Ugh," Chloe sniffed, " They've got dirt all over my Gucci purse!"

Sabrina walked over to her friend, brushing the imaginary dust off while rolling her eyes.

"Hey Nath!! Wait up!!" A voice called from behind them, causing the group to halt.

Marc, a boy from another class, ran up to them and threw his arms around Nathaniel, planting a chaste kiss on his cheek. He smiled and hugged Marc back.

"Care to introduce us Kurtzberg?" Marinette smiled.

"Oh, yeah," Nathaniel released Marc and stood sheepishly facing his friends, "Marc, this is my class, my class, this is my boyfriend Marc."

"Awwww!! You're so cute together!" Rose squeaked.

Nathaniel visibly relaxed, he hadn't thought his class had any homophobes but-

"What!? You're GAY!!! Disgusting!" Chloe catcalled.

The class turned toward Chloe but, before they could do anything, a tiny hand slapped Chloe across the face.

"How dare you!!" Rose yelled at her, "Being gay isn't disgusting!! It's absolutely wonderful that Nath felt he could tell us and you will NOT mess up his confidence!"

The whole class backed away and Chloe gazed at her attacker in confusion. Juleka however stepped up behind Rose and placed her hands on her shoulders.

"Oh and you're an expert since when?" Chloe sneered, having composed herself again.

"You know what! I am!" Rose turned around and, grabbing Juleka's face, kissed her.

"Wha-I-I-no-umm," Chloe stammered out, looking at the stony faces of her fellow classmates. She turned and ran for her life.

After a few seconds of silence, the class swarmed round the two couples, introducing themselves to Marc and congratulating Rose. Then, Alix and Kim came speeding back down the path towards them.

"C'mon guys! You're taking forever!!" Alix panted out, "And Kim, that's two cakes you owe me now!"

She looked at her frozen classmates, shrugged, and skated over to Nathaniel.

"So, you must be Marc right? The boy who stole our Tomato's heart?"

"Yes?" Replied Marc shyly.

Alix grinned and punched Nath in the shoulder, "Nice catch Picasso!! Your red complexion paid off!"

Nathaniel instantly turned a interesting shade of red, setting the class giggling. They all began walking to the bakery as Alya filled in Alix and Kim on what had happened.

As they exited the bakery, Alix grabbed Rose and Juleka by their elbows.

"Thanks for defending Nath, I owe you one," she muttered before racing away.

___________Members-Marinette, Alya, Adrien and Nino_____________________________________________

The final four members of the class were actually recruited by Alix. A few days after the second incident, Alix approached the four with a home-made leaflet in her hand.

"Hey Alix!" Alya called, "Whacha got there?"

Alix rolled closer and gave Nino the leaflet, "Me, Rose and Juleka are starting a... selective club. We were wondering if you could join?"

"The NDS, free shades on sign up," Nino read.

"What's the NDS?" Adrien wanted to know.

"Ah, Sunshine Child, I'm glad you asked that question! This is the Nathaniel defence squad. We defend Nath whatever the consequences, whatever the situation," Alix smiled, " Think you can manage that?"

"Free shades? Hell yeah!!" Nino exclaimed.

"Sure, I'll join," Alya suddenly perked up, "Hey! I could start a blog for it!"

Marinette butted in, "And I could do some T-shirts!"

"And I could...ummmmm..."Adrien trailed off.

"Provide comic relief?" Alix suggested.

"YEAH!! What you said!" Adrien grinned triumphantly round at them.

"Awesome! I'll get you your sunglasses soon," Alix turned and skated away.

..........

Soon the T-shirts and the sunglasses were distributed and the squad - all wearing black, zip up hoodies over the T-shirts - met by the park and walked to school. .........

Raoul and his gang had cornered Nathaniel after school, Raoul trying to make up for his embarrassment at the ~~hands~~ fists of Alix.

"So, Nathaniel, I believe we have unfinished business. And, where is your little munchkin, my boys here want a little... word with her."

Joshua and Alfie growled and crunched their knuckles in unison. However, Nathaniel wasn't concentrating on them. He was looking past the bullies with an expression of amusement and annoyance.

"Her? She's right behind you!" he sniggered as the bullies span around instantly.

In front of them stood the entire NDS, sunglasses on, T-shirts visible.

"Hello again," smirked Alix, " I believe you wanted a word?"

The bullies ran like the wind, leaving the NDS and Nathaniel in hysterics.

"Did you see their faces!" Nath giggled.

Alya stepped forward, "Like the T-shirts? We've even got a blog running!"

Nath rolled his eyes, "I'm guessing Alix is behind this?"

"Yep!" She grabbed his arm, " And you're stuck with us so lets go get cake!"

The others cheered and they headed off, dragging an irritated and embarrassed Nathaniel behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bonus:  
> Nath: Guys, please, you're stalking me everywhere and scaring people. I've had three people come and ask me if I'm ok.  
> NDS: *Put on sunglasses and fade into the crowd* We are watching you....  
> Nath: *Face-palms*  
> 😎


	3. A random load of Alix memes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I own none of these. These are just Alix and her friends being... themseleves.

Alix, singing to the tune of Santa Claus is coming to town: You better watch out...  
Kim, joining in: You better watch out, you better watch out.  
Nathaniel, Alix and Kim chanting: You better watch out YOU BETTER WATCH OUT YOU BETTER WATCH OUT.  
___________________  
Kim: I tried to make the password ‘Alix’ but it told me it was too short.  
Alix: Funny. I tried to make my password ‘Kim’ and it told me it was too WEAK.  
Max: You guys will get hacked with passwords like that.  
_________________  
Max: Oh look there’s glass.  
Kim: *looks at ground* I guess there is.  
Alix: Crunchy.  
Max: Wait what did you say?  
Alix: CRUNCHY.  
Kim: Did you mean when you step on it or when you eat it?  
Alix: C R U N C H Y  
_________________  
Alix: I’m tall!  
Kim: If you’re tall then Max isn’t smart.  
_________________  
Bunnix: just ONCE  
Adult Carapace: yes, once, i promise.  
Bunnix: you better  
Bunnix: *opens portal to the past right above Gabriel Agreste's sleeping body*  
Adult Carapace: *punches him twice*  
Bunnix: *closes portal quickly* NINO I SAID ONCE  
Adult Carapace: BUT DUDE HE HAS SUCH A PUNCHABLE FACE I COULDN'T RESIST, HE WAS JUST ASKING FOR IT  
Bunnix: ............... yeah he was  
_________________  
Alix: *clicks pen*  
Max: *clicks pen in response*  
Kim: Stop that.  
Max: Stop what?  
Kim: You’re talking about me in Morse Code.  
Alix: Yeah, that’s what we’re doing. In our very limited free time, we took a class on a very outdated, very unnecessary form of communication just so we could talk about you in front of you.  
Alix (to Nathaniel): That’s…exactly what we did.  
_______________  
Kim: My heart says yes but Alix and Max say no.  
_______________  
Kim: *grabs the scissors and cuts Alix's left ponytail.*  
also Kim: *cuts Alix's earphone*  
Alix: DUDE, WHAT THE FRICK,, I JUST BOUGHT THESE HEADPHONES-  
Kim: *pointing the ponytail*  
Alix, looking at her ponytail cut: whAT?!  
also Alix, screaming: *grabbing her ponytail*  
______________  
Max: How many Alix's does it take to change a lightbulb?  
Kim: Just one. The real question is, how many ladders does she need?  
Alix: *offended noises*  
______________  
Nathaniel: I want to see my little girl~  
Kim: *holding Alix* Here she comes~  
Nathaniel: I want to see my little girl~  
Alix: I will murder both of you in your sleep...  
_____________  
Nathaniel: What if I start mixing energy drinks and black coffee?  
Alix: Hell yeah, there’s no god here to judge us.  
_____________  
Alix: Tall people think that touching the top of the doorway is a personality trait.  
______________  
“No way! I was totally the most dangerous!” Alya said, crossing her arms. “I almost got Ladybug’s earrings!”  
“Well I turned Chat Noir evil,” Kim shot back.  
The class continued to argue for quite some time before Alix piped up.  
“I killed all of you AND Chat Noir,” she said. Silence followed.  
_______________  
King Monkey: See? See, one day you're gonna look back on this and laugh.  
Bunnyx: I assure you, for the rest of my life, every time I look back on this I will personally drive over to your house and smack you.  
______________  
Alix: I keep cursing in ice cream flavours and my dad has told me to stop.  
Alix: Update: I still haven't stopped.  
Nathaniel: How do you curse in ice cream flavours?  
Alix: What the mint chocolate chip did you say to me punk; I'll kick your rocky road and then punch the ever loving strawberry cheesecake out of you.  
Marinette: That was beautiful.  
____________  
Alix: I’M DROWNING HELP  
Kim: Calm down, it’s only five feet of water.  
Alix: NOT ALL PEOPLE ARE TALL  
____________  
Kim: Me, you, and Max are going to have the awesomest summer of all time!  
Max: The correct way to say it is: “You, Max, and I are going to have the most awesome summer of all time.”  
Alix: You’ve reached the point where you’re sucking the fun out of things before they happen.  
Max: But proper grammar is fun.  
___________  
Max: I got x = 7  
Alix: well I think I might have gone wrong somewhere  
Max: what?  
Alix: I got x = potato  
___________  
Max: [at Alix] This is your badness level.  
Max: It's unusually high for someone your size.  
____________  
Nathaniel: Alix, I’m a professional artist, m'kay?  
Alix: What’s your point?  
Nathaniel: My point is I know a lot of things about art, about 578-579 last time I counted, and I know this colour is GRASSY. GREEN.  
Alix: Oh yeah? Well I’m a professional skater and I know like 5 or 6 things about drawing and I say it’s emerald green!  
___________  
Max: *is choking*  
Alix: help! I need to call 911 but the 9 button isn’t working!  
Kim: Just turn it upside down and use the 6!  
Alix: Genius!  
Max: *stops choking momentarily* what the fuck?  
___________  
Adrienette:  
Alya: hey girl, where were you?!  
Mari: hey, sorry I was busy doing stuff  
Adrien: I’m stuff *winks*  
Mari: *flusteredness*

VS

HeartRate  
Nath: Alix why are you late?  
Alix: me and Kim were making out in the closet  
Kim: Hell yeah we were!  
Alix and Kim: *high five*  
_______________  
Alix: Hey, do you have a bag I can borrow?  
Nathaniel: The only bags I have are the ones under my eyes, and they’re specifically designed to carry the burden of my existence.  
Alix: Literally all you had to do was say no.  
______________  
Alix: WOAH LOOK AT YOU!  
Bunnix: I know, you have a miraculous isn’t that co-  
Alix: I DO GET TALLER!!!  
______________  
[trying to break into a locked room]  
Alix: Adrien, quick, give me your credit card.  
Adrien: *gives Alix one of his credit cards*  
Alix: Great. Ivan, kick the door in.  
______________  
Marinette: Why is Alix standing on the table?  
Kim: She likes to feel tall.  
______________  
Marinette: Situation - You walk in a room to find that the only way to escape is by writing a name of a real person on a piece of paper. This will kill that person.  
Marinette: …  
Marinette: Alix … Alix, you only need to write one name.  
_______________  
Kim: You shouldn’t insult people who are bigger than you  
Alix: Then I’d never get to insult anyone, and we can’t have that  
_______________  
Alix: Can you guys at least try to see this from my perspective?  
Kim and Nathaniel: *Crouch down*  
Alix: I hate both of you.  
________________  
Alix: I will put my “A” down to make “A.”  
Kim: I will add onto your “A” to make “AT.”  
Nathaniel: I will add on to your “AT” to make “RAT.”  
Max: I will add on to your “RAT” to make “BIOSTRATIGRAPHIC.”  
Kim: *knocks the game board on the floor*  
_________________  
Website: Choose your password  
Kim: Alix  
Website: password is too short  
Kim: I know

_________________  
Alix: My boyfriend is too tall for me to kiss him on the lips. What should I do?  
Chloé: Punch him in the stomach and when he doubles over in pain, kiss him.  
Marinette: Tackle him.  
Alya: Kick him in the shins.  
Kim: No to all of those! Just ask me to lean down!

_________________  
Kim: Too bad, Max, because I've got an ace up my sleeve!  
Alix: *stuck in the sleeve of one of Kim's hoodies*  
Alix: Let me out you moron!  
_________________  
Chloe: [holding a broken coffee machine] Who broke it? I’m not mad, I just want to know.

Adrien: …I did. I broke it.

Chloe: No. No, you didn’t. Alya?

Alya: Don’t look at me, look at Nino.

Nino: What?! I didn’t break it!

Alya: Huh, that’s weird. How’d you even know it was broken?

Nino: Because it’s sitting right in front of us and it’s broken!

Alya: Suspicious.

Nino: No, it’s not!

Sabrina: If it matters, probably not but…Marinette was the last one to use it.

Marinette: Liar, I don’t even drink that crap!

Sabrina: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Marinette: I use the wooden stirrers as part of my art projects, everyone knows that, Sabrina!

Adrien: Okay, okay, let’s not fight, I broke it. Let me pay for it, Chloe.

Chloe: No. Who broke it?

Kim: Chloe…Alix has been really quiet this whole time…

Alix: Really?!

Kim: Yeah!

Alix: Oh my God!

[arguing ensues]

Chloe, looking at the camera: I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it. I predict ten minutes from now they’ll be at each other’s throats with war paint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that is the trash my friends send me!! If you want more random memes just tell me in the comments!!!!!


End file.
